freedom
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> filling in the time...
> just what do you take me for?
> love spring for the sakura!
> 恋に落ちれば？
> sakura :)
> p.s. i love you
> returning to movie-watching days
> it is too early to be awake when i'm not going to ...
> early morning outing, anyone?
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More random thoughts. Labels: misc, relationships
When people take the day off and go out, I suppose there are fun stuff that they are good at that they do. It seems that there are many means of entertainment, but a lot of them are... acquired skills. Thinking of those around me, or general examples, there are people who're good at singing, kite flying, bowling, cycling, gaming, sports, playing pool... It almost seems that a lot of these going-out activities aren't for me. Sure I can go to karaoke, or bowling centre, or arcade etc, but I'd rather not. Why? Because I suck at singing, bowling and gaming! Sports... I suppose I'm decent at, but it's not something I want to do on a free day, generally.
Then the question becomes: what do I do in my free time? Uhm. I do stuff that doesn't require much skill? For example, watch movies, read, shop, sit down somewhere and chat with friends over a meal? When there's a need to kill time and we aren't doing any of the above, I feel really... lost. And it's a little embarrassing when we go someplace that I don't usually frequent and I proceed to show just how bad I am at whatever we're doing. It's especially bad when it's someone I want to impress!
Imagine these:
- going cycling, but because you're so lousy at U-turns you crash into a lamp post and fly over your handlebars. you can pretend you were trying to fly a la superman, but you both know it's a futile attempt to cover up your ineptness
- you go to a karaoke place together and you scare him shitless/ give him the heebie-jeebies with your atrocious singing. you can try to laugh it off, but probably only be able to muster a pained smile
- you play pool together, and apart from jabbing some poor stranger repeatedly with your cue because you're so clumsy, your aiming is terrible and you don't make contact with the ball at all. maybe it's parallax error, but it's more probable that there's something wrong with your eyes
- at a bowling centre your ball keeps going into the drain while he keeps having strikes or something. you can pull a william hung and say, "i have had no professional training", but it doesn't change the fact that you suck!
- he's a kite-flying expert, while you trip over your own shoelaces while running and trying to get the kite up, and get a faceful of dirt and grass. "um, mud and grass spa!" you say.
For all your efforts, you just get a bruised ego. Worse still, your date is sniggering behind his hands trying hard not to laugh at how hopeless you are! Oh wait, I should stop saying "you", since it's quite likely I'm talking about myself. Okay, ME then.
What should I do then? Impress him with:
- my shopping stamina, and how I can walk for hours even in high heels when it comes to shopping?
- Or go with him to a buffet and show him just how much food I can fit into my relatively small frame?
- Or hit the cinema repeatedly to prove that I'm a movie lover (just that it's going to cost a bomb to do that)?
- Or sit him down with me, finish a thick novel and impress him with my reading speed?
- Or show him just how much I can talk (which is quite a lot when I'm in the mood)?
While I usually pride myself on my fitness, let's be realistic. It's rather unlikely that I can outrun a guy, lift heavier weights than he can, play most sports better than he can... Oh wait, I can probably win 9 out of 10 guys I date at table tennis, because there aren't very many paddlers out there. And if the guy isn't a fitness freak, maybe I've got stronger abs. But that's about it!
Initial dates are difficult. Ah, forget all the different entertainment avenues! I shall unveil my winning personality and blow him away, bowl him over, knock him down...! Or I can just show him how much I can blog about nonsensical stuff when I'm bored. Literary talent, you know? =p